If the World Was Crazy
By Shel Silverstein
If the world was crazy, you know what I'd eat?
A big slice of soup and a whole quart of meat,
A lemonade sandwich, and then I might try
Some roasted ice cream or a bicycle pie,
A nice notebook salad, an underwear roast,
An omelet of hats and some crisp cardboard toast,
A thick malted milk made from pencils and daisies,
And that's what I'd eat if the world was crazy.
If the world was crazy, you know what I'd wear?
A chocolate suit and a tie of eclair,
Some marshmallow earmuffs, some licorice shoes,
And I'd read a paper of peppermint news.
I'd call the boys "Suzy" and I'd call the girls "Harry,"
I'd talk through my ears, and I always would carry
A paper umbrella for when it grew hazy
To keep in the rain, if the world was crazy.
If the world was crazy, you know what I'd do?
I'd walk on the ocean and swim in my shoe,
I'd fly through the ground and I'd skip through the air,
I'd run down the bathtub and bathe on the stair.
When I met somebody I'd say "G'bye, Joe,"
And when I was leaving--then I'd say "Hello."
And the greatest of men would be silly and lazy
So I would be king...if the world was crazy.
Quickie because I was happily busy all day and evening and we are going to Richmond early tomorrow to see the Chihuly exhibit at the VMFA, then the winter lights show at the botanical gardens. Thank you so much everyone who made my birthday so awesome -- people who sent v-gifts and left posts here, posted on my Facebook wall, or e-mailed (I will not try to name them all because I'm afraid of missing someone but trust me I know who you are)! Kay took me to Tara Thai for lunch, after which I stopped in Charming Charlie (awesome stuff on the bargain rack) and Target (since the need for laundry detergent never ends).
Adam brought Maddy home since she had missed her bus, so I hung out with them for part of the afternoon -- I hesitated to leave them alone in the house but I had to get into the woods while the weather was so gorgeous. Paul made me peanut noodles and (fake) orange chicken for dinner, and gave me the restored Blu-Ray of Little Shop of Horrors with the original ending which I have now finally seen! He also made me an Avengers card, which I will scan before the week is over. Meanwhile here is my ridiculous birthday present to myself: a Tarot "deck" made up entirely of Superpoke Pets habitats (click the image for the full set):