Maybe Dats Your Pwoblem Too
By James W. Hall
All my pwoblems
who knows, maybe evwybody's pwoblems
is due to da fact, due to da awful twuth
dat I am SPIDERMAN.
I know. I know. All da dumb jokes:
No flies on you, ha ha,
and da ones about what do I do wit all
doze extwa legs in bed. Well, dat's funny yeah.
But you twy being
SPIDERMAN for a month or two. Go ahead.
You get doze cwazy calls fwom da
Gubbener askin you to twap some booglar who's
only twying to wip off color T.V. sets.
Now, what do I cawre about T.V. sets?
But I pull on da suit, da stinkin suit,
wit da sucker cups on da fingers,
and get my wopes and wittle bundle of
equipment and den I go flying like cwazy
acwoss da town fwom woof top to woof top.
Till der he is. Some poor dumb color T.V. slob
and I fall on him and we westle a widdle
until I get him all woped. So big deal.
You tink when you SPIDERMAN
der's sometin big going to happen to you.
Well, I tell you what. It don't happen dat way.
Nuttin happens. Gubbener calls, I go.
Bwing him to powice, Gubbener calls again,
like dat over and over.
I tink I twy sometin diffunt. I tink I twy
sometin excitin like wacing cawrs. Sometin to make
my heart beat at a difwent wate.
But den you just can't quit being sometin like
You SPIDERMAN for life. Fowever. I can't even
buin my suit. It won't buin. It's fwame wesistent.
So maybe dat's youwr pwoblem too, who knows.
Maybe dat's da whole pwoblem wif evwytin.
Nobody can buin der suits, dey all fwame wesistent.
Adam worked from home on Friday, so he and I had a quiet morning working on our computers, then at lunchtime I went to dye my hair so he received a lot of cat help while I did that and ran out to catch an Ash's Pikachu while the anniversary event is going on. Adam had plans in the evening to meet his friend Robert and see Spider-Man: Homecoming, so Paul and I decided to see it too, though we ended up going to different shows because Paul and I went early to have dinner at Cava in the mall while Adam went to dinner with Robert and his parents, which took longer.
If I hadn't just seen Wonder Woman, I might have felt that this Spider-Man was my favorite superhero movie, though it's hard to separate from the long Avengers history woven through it. I thought I might resent having Tony Stark hone in on what should be Peter's movie, but I loved his role, and the other significant Avenger cameos were delightful. My brain was turned off sufficiently that I did not see the homecoming date problem coming, and although the film only squeaks a Bechdel pass, at least it's two women of color discussing academic pursuits!
When we got home we watched the end of the Nationals game, which had a delightful conclusion in the tenth inning. But speaking of academic pursuits, here are some photos from the Da Vinci Alive exhibit at the Science Museum of Virginia last weekend, including a portable bridge, a design for a revolving stage with ball bearings, Vitruvian Man, a precise replica of the Mona Lisa, a model of a bicycle, an infinite mirror room, and replicas of the Codex Forster: