The Little Review (littlereview) wrote,
The Little Review

Poem for Tuesday and PA Renfaire Joust

A Ditty
By Sir Philip Sidney

My true-love hath my heart, and I have his,
By just exchange one to the other given:
I hold his dear, and mine he cannot miss,
There never was a better bargain driven:
My true-love hath my heart, and I have his.

His heart in me keeps him and me in one,
My heart in him his thoughts and senses guides:
He loves my heart, for once it was his own,
I cherish his because in me it bides:
My true-love hath my heart, and I have his.


We spent a beautiful early fall day at the Pennsylvania Renaissance Faire with Paul's parents, who are finally back from traveling out west to see his brothers and various other family and friends. We picked my in-laws up in Hanover en route to the faire, which is on the other side of Harrisburg -- we always get to see Three Mile Island from the bridge en route. As soon as we got there, we went to see Don Juan & Miguel; Don Juan had hurt his ankle so wasn't swordfighting blindfolded, but they were funny as always (same corny cheese jokes, new Lady Gaga references). Then we grabbed lunch -- crepes -- while listening to Celtic music by Sloanwolfe, after which we got chocolate-covered cheesecake and fruit from the confectionery with the chocolate fountain, then went to the early afternoon joust, at which Sir Marcus behaved badly and set up the evening's joust-to-the-death. Sir Marcus's very stupid but pretty second, Sir Thomas, was the highlight of that show for me, though my kids were rooting for Sir Corwin's second, Sir Alan, so they could make Volvic Tyrannosaurus Alan jokes.

After the joust, we walked through the marketplace, visited the greyhound rescue tent, and saw the Rakish Rogues and Sultry Sirens of Sin, who sing naughty songs ("Who Are the People in Your Neighborhood" is very different when they do it -- in addition to misbehaving butchers and postmen, apparently Yoda, Professor Snape, and a Star Trek away team are people in my neighborhood -- and who pointed out that if our kids got their dirty jokes, it wasn't their fault). We also saw sword swallower Thom Sellectomy and Tribal Circus acrobats Shelli and Martin -- the latter juggled fire and did some of the sorts of things Barely Balanced does, so we weren't too upset they weren't at the Faire yet, though one of their acrobats is now singing with the Dandy Pirates whom we heard singing on the way to lunch. Before the evening joust, those of us who eat seafood had crab cakes for dinner, and those of us who do not had soup bowls and sandwiches. Then we went to see the arena pageantry, which was standing room only, where we witnessed the following (potential spoilers for this year's Faire storyline):

The Queen and her courtiers watch the start of the joust-to-the-death demanded by Sir Marcus after being bested by Sir Corwin in the earlier competition.

As is typical in this version of the Renaissance, the joust starts traditionally enough...

...but then the seconds get involved, and someone falls off a horse, and mayhem ensues...

...which generally involves attacks with swords, daggers, axes, and in this case a mace.

And that's all before King Philip of Spain's assassins arrive.

Not that the Spaniards have a chance against English fireworks. Er, gunpowder.

The traitor gets dispatched, the crowd gets the "bloodshed" it has been demanding...

...and as the sun goes down, the triumphant knights stand over the bodies of the fallen attackers, until the attackers rise and parade out with the rest of the court to go sing songs at the Globe Theatre!

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